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Living by the scriptures

For verily I say unto you, blessed is he that keepeth my commandments, whether in life or in death; and he that is faithful in tribulation. . . .

Ye cannot behold with your natural eyes, for the present time, the design of your God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation.

For after much tribulation come the blessings. Wherefore the day cometh that ye shall be crowned with much glory; the hour is not yet, but is nigh at hand.

— Doctrine and Covenants 58:2-4.

Five years ago my child began to have severe mood swings. Eventually the mood swings became so severe, hospitalization was necessary. My child was finally diagnosed as being bi-polar (manic-depressive).

Even though we received a diagnosis for our child, it didn't do much in the way of comfort. I did not understand mental illness and was very leery of the medication and treatment prescribed. We endured many hospitalizations and medication adjust- ments.

Some of the medications left this child near death because of allergic reactions. It seemed the dosages were either too high or too low. Through it all we dealt with the erratic behavior of a person with bi-polar disorder. The anger, violence, depression, manic and suicide spells, exacted their toll on me.

Finally it all came to a head with yet another hospitalization. In my despair, I took to my room and could find no comfort. I was crushed and in such agony with worry. My sobbing was like nothing I had ever experienced. I was so tormented and I could not get myself under control. I had prayed, read my scriptures, sent sons on missions, fulfilled my Church callings, rarely missed a meeting, and read the Book of Mormon with our family for the past 10 years. What was God trying to teach me from this experience?

My adult children tried to comfort me, and my friends tried talking to me. They suggested I read my scriptures and pray, which brought more despair to me. "I have read, and I have prayed!" was my anguished reply.

Then a friend of one of my daughters walked into my room opened my scriptures and pointed to Doctrine and Covenants 98:12, and then quietly left my room. "I've read that one already," I sobbed and I flipped the pages with a sweep of my hand. The pages stopped at Section 58, and I read the verses I had previously highlighted. My sobs stopped. Peace once again filled my soul as my spiritual eyes beheld the love my Savior has for me. I knew the Lord was mindful of my distress, and that He knew I was a faithful daughter. I understood the role tribulation plays in our progression, and preparation for eternal life.

Shortly thereafter, I received a call from the hospital which relieved me of the fears I was feeling for my child's well being. Not only had my prayers been answered, but a little more of the mysteries of the kingdom had been unfolded in my mind. — Debra Hurst, Rolla, Missouri

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