Teach by example. The most powerful tool parents have for teaching their children just about anything is example.
If a parent whines and moans about sacrificing or serving others, the children will probably reflect that same attitude. If a parent makes a sacrifice for someone out of love and concern, rather than obligation, the children will sense this also.- Focus attention on the reason for sacrificing, not just on what is given up. If your family is sacrificing to help someone serving in the mission field, focus on the joy that comes into people's lives when they learn of the gospel.
If you're taking a meal to a family in need, explain the circumstances to your children. Ask them to help prepare some part of the meal so that they feel like they're contributing.
Make sure that they see some of the good that came from their efforts. Sometimes when I was a child, I would go along when my mother was performing an act of compassionate service because I had no choice in the matter. Later, after seeing how much the help was needed and appreciated, I would repent of my earlier selfishness. - Janice Leilani Smith, Kingsville, Texas
How we did it:
Best treasure
Last week for family home evening, my husband, Mark, planned a lesson on sacrifice. He assigned our four young sons to bring their best treasure to family home evening. Each boy took a turn proudly showing his treasure and explaining why it was so important to him. Then Mark asked each son to give his treasure to another, forever. Seven-year-old Stephen did it with some reluctance. Eight-year-old John did OK, too, but 5-year-old Daniel cried and refused.
After returning the treasures to their original owners, Mark led a discussion on sacrifice - how it feels and that it's not easy. We also discussed Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, and Abraham and Isaac - being examples to us.
Also, living in China, we must do without many conveniences, products and programs readily available in the United States. Mark and I make a conscious effort not to complain, but to make do. Once our family home evening treat was banana splits, with rice substituted for the ice cream. I think it was more fun that way, actually. We hope our children learn from our example that attitude is more important than things, thereby making sacrifices a joy rather than a burden. - Linley Baker, Shanghai, China
`Trick or treat'
As I reared my three children in a single-parent home in the 1960s, I wanted more than anything to teach them the loving, giving qualities of our Savior Jesus Christ. We were very poor, at or below poverty, yet I wanted them to be able to give.
It became a tradition for several years for them to go out early on Halloween night carrying very large grocery bags and run from door to door declaring, "Trick or treat for Franklin Village," a county children's home in Columbus, Ohio. We lived in Columbus while my children were young. As the bags filled quickly, we drove to the "Village" where we donated the treats for the many children there who did not have the privilege of going out on Halloween. - Bea Mounts, Bloomington, Ind.
Honest tithing
As in teaching any principle, example is of first importance, but with good judgment. Having lived a lot of years, I have seen families sacrifice all for their children, while the children accepted without gratitude, disregarding others' needs.
Children must be taught to share the responsibilities of family and society; they, in turn, must sacrifice. They must realize that the needs of others are as important as their own, and through love and concern, they too, must contribute to these needs.
Perhaps the first way children learn to sacrifice is in sharing their toys and other possessions. Next comes the beautiful sacrifice of learning to pay an honest tithing and, later, fast and other offerings. The joy of participating in the support of this great Church is a privilege that helps youth understand sacrifice. - Lois Dahlberg, Tacoma, Wash.
Mother's example
Sacrifice is synonymous with service. My mother, Jeannine Jensen, is a gifted singer, and she has shared her talent at Church and social functions since she was a young girl. Throughout my youth, Mother entertained at a health care facility for those who are mentally disturbed and at the seniors' lodge in our town several times a year, including Christmastime.
When my wife and I returned to live in Raymond, Alberta, it was natural to us to begin serving at the Raymond Care Centre and Ridgeview Lodge for seniors by doing Church services and entertaining frequently throughout the years, as I had observed my mother doing. Our children have been singing for others almost since they were babies. - A. Ross Jensen, Raymond, Alberta
Blessing inherent
As with all God's teaching, He respects the sacred principle of moral agency. As we teach our children, we need to emphasize the choices they make every day and the moral agency they enjoy. When sacrifice is required, we need to arm our children with the knowledge that they are free to choose their attitude toward that sacrifice. My husband is a bishop, and one could view the amount of time he is away from the family as a sacrifice. But we have taught the children that to choose to serve the Lord is not a sacrifice, but rather a privilege. This empowers them to have a positive attitude toward his absence.
No one can do everything. If we choose to do one thing, we are not doing another. For example, as our teenagers go to seminary at 6 a.m., they are choosing to be where the Lord wants them to be. They are sacrificing an extra hour of sleep for a greater good. Inherent in the sacrifice is a blessing that makes the sacrifice not a sacrifice, but rather an opportunity to learn a principle from the Lord. - Lisa Clayton, Newport Beach, Calif.
Savior's sacrifice
Teach them when they're young to share with others. Then as they grow older, you teach them about fasting and giving up of food for others.
Teach them to think of others' needs, such as through courtesy and kindness.
Teach them about the sacrifice of time. This can come by involving your children in doing service for others. In addition, encourage your children to accept any assignments given at Church.
Make them aware that what they're giving up, they get back in the form of blessings.
Let the children know that whatever they give up is small in comparison to the Savior giving His life for us. - Cindy Goleman, Salt Lake City, Utah
How to checklist:
1 Teach children about the Savior's sacrifice for them.
2 Teach them about tithing, fasting and Church service.
3 Involve children in service, both for family and others.
4 Be an example; portray positive attitude about sacrifice.
WRITE TO US:
April 15 "How to enhance your commitment to Church service beyond the three-hour block schedule."
April 22 "How to sustain the priesthood in the home."
April 29 "How to help those who are less-active."
May 6 "How to draw closer to those to whom you are assigned as a home or visiting teacher."
May 13 "How to cope with and find peace after the death of a child."
May 20 "How to find joy in work."
Had any good experiences or practical success in any of the above subjects? Share them with our readers in about 100-150 words. Write the "How-to" editor, Church News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, or send fax to (801) 237-2121. Please include a name and phone number. Contributions may be edited or excerpted and will not be returned. Due to limited space, some contributions may not be used; those used should not be regarded as official Church doctrine or policy. Material must be received at least 12 days before publication date.
