The spirit must be freed from tethers and hard feelings, "so that the lift of life may give buoyancy to the soul," said President Thomas S. Monson, first counselor in the First Presidency.
Enlisting Samuel T. Whitman's account "Forgotten Wedges," President Monson told the narrative of a big walnut tree that was downed by an ice storm because of a large iron wedge that had been laid between the limbs of the tree decades earlier. Over time, the tree had grown over the wedge and prevented the limb fibers from knitting together as they should. The ice storm caused one of the limbs to split, leaving the remainder of the tree unbalanced and vulnerable. When the storm ended, not a twig of the once proud tree remained. The forgotten wedge was to blame.
"There are hidden wedges in the lives of many whom we know — yes, perhaps in our own families," said President Monson during the Saturday morning session.
President Monson shared the experience of an affable, lifelong friend named Leonard who never joined the Church although his wife and children were faithful members. Leonard supported his family in their Church assignments. He lived a good, clean life replete with service and kindness. Many wondered why this solid man never joined the Church.
In his advanced years, Leonard's health began to fail. President Monson recalled his last visit with his friend. Leonard told him that he had never joined the Church because he had harbored the sting of being deceived by a trusted Church member long ago.
"He confided to me following our conversation that he felt a great burden had been lifted as he prepared to meet his Maker," President Monson said. "The tragedy is that a hidden wedge had kept Leonard from soaring to greater heights."
President Monson then told of a poor but faithful immigrant family who had made a home in America. Tragedy visited the family when their infant son died. The father built a beautiful casket for his son. On the day of the young child's funeral the father, accompanied by family and a small group of friends, carried the small casket to the chapel. The chapel was locked. A busy bishop had forgotten to open to door for the funeral and the family had no choice but to return home with the casket in a drenching rain.
"If the family were of lesser character, they could have blamed the bishop and harbored ill feelings," President Monson said. "When the bishop discovered the tragedy, he visited the family and apologized. With the hurt still evident in his expression, but with tears in his eyes, the father accepted the apology and the two embraced in a spirit of understanding. No hidden wedge was left to cause further feelings of anger."
Hurt feelings and "a reluctance to forgive" exists in many families, President Monson said.
"It doesn't really matter what the issue was. It cannot and should not be left to injure. Blame keeps wounds open. Only forgiveness heals," President Monson declared.
The Savior, he added, offered these beautiful words as He was about to die upon the cross: "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do." (Luke 23: 34.)
Some have difficulty forgiving themselves and dwell on all of their perceived shortcomings, President Monson noted. But the Lord loves and helps His children and listens when they call.
"In a day of danger or a time of trial, such knowledge, such hope, such understanding will bring comfort to the troubled mind and grieving heart," President Monson said. "The entire message of the New Testament breathes a spirit of awakening to the human soul. Shadows of despair are dispelled by rays of hope, sorrow yields to joy and the feeling of being lost in the crowd of life vanishes with the certain knowledge that our Heavenly Father is mindful of each of us."
The Savior taught that even a sparrow's fall to the ground is noticed by the Father, President Monson said.
"He then concluded the beautiful thought by saying, 'Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.' " (Matthew 10:31.)
People can sometime take offense so easily; other times, folks are too stubborn to accept a sincere apology, President Monson observed.
"Who will subordinate ego, pride and hurt — then step forward with, 'I am truly sorry! Let's be as we once were: friends. Let's not pass to future generations the grievances, the anger of our time,' " President Monson counseled. "Let's remove any hidden wedges that can do nothing but destroy."
President Monson then asked where hidden wedges originate.
"Some come from unresolved disputes, which lead to ill feelings, followed by remorse and regret," he answered. "Others find their beginnings in disappointments, jealousies, arguments and imagined hurts. We must solve them — lay them to rest and not leave them to canker, fester and ultimately destroy."
President Monson counseled members to be faithful in keeping all of the commandments, "that we may harbor no hidden wedges but rather remember the Savior's admonition: 'By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.' " (John 13:35.)
